Lost In Translation
by Zirolyte
Summary: Humans are so confusing, the things they say so strange. How does Bella end up causing Edward to kiss Jacob? Who knows unless you read this.


Lost in translation.

"He spoke the words slowly. "You don't want to be my wife."

My heart stopped, and then broke into a sprint. A cold sweat dewed on the back of my neck and my hands turned to ice. I spoke without thinking.

"Edward, it would be more likely that you were to kiss Jacob than for me to agree to marry you."

* * *

I was driving the others insane, I should know, I can hear their thoughts!

Jasper was thinking of coming to cam me down, Alice was busy predicting the future, Esme and Carlisle were worrying and Emmet was laughing. Same as always I suppose.

But what had _she_ meant by that.

"_**Edward, it would be more likely that you were to kiss Jacob than for me to agree to marry you." **_

I knew that she would not necessarily jump at the idea, but this _**is **_Bella we're talking about. I didn't expect her to actually bet against it! If she loves me so much then why does she oppose the idea so strongly? Perhaps my non-relationship with Jacob is causing her to pause. Maybe she likes him more? Or perhaps… no it can't be ... she's in love with him too?

Why else would she come out with something like that, does the idea of us kissing amuse her… or worse **please **her?! The thought disturbs me. In fact it has not left my mind since our little talk.

Either way I should try and be nicer about Jacob if I want to win her over on this matter. Perhaps all she needs is a little time to come around to the idea of marrying me. I'll wait a few days before mentioning it again; hopefully by then she'll have at least considered it.

* * *

_**I glanced, wide eyed from Edwards Grimace to Jacobs sneer. "What are you doing to him?" I demanded. It's nothing Bella. Edward told me quietly. Jacob just has a good memory, that's all. Jacob grinned and Edward grimaced again. "Stop it! Whatever you're doing."**_

"_**Sure if you want" Jacob shrugged. "its his own fault if he doesn't like the things I remember though. I glared at him, and he smiled back impishly like a kid caught doing something he knows he shouldn't .By someone who he knows wont punish him. **_

"_**oh Why cant you two just kiss and make up?! This is driving me insane. Is it really so hard for the two of you to get along, just because your ancestors were mortal enemies? **_

(pg 82- eclipse)

* * *

She's done it again with the 'kissing'.

"_**Why don't you two just kiss and make up?"**_

That dog was in school, what did she expect me to do, ignore him and his awful stench?

Our squabble inevitably irritated her, and we ended up fighting. _All because of him. _

Because of him she is risking her life. Because of him she nearly died. So why does she still insist upon treating him like he's her best friend or something.

Perhaps it's just her human nature; after all she is drawn like a magnet to anything dangerous.

Or just maybe my original ideas were correct. Maybe she does want me to be friends with him. If I 'kissed and made up' with him would she agree to be my wife? I'll have to have a serious talk about this with her. If my relationship with Jacob is coming between her and myself, then I am going to have to do something about it. Well now is better than later!

later

This cub is an idiot. I offered him my civil hand, and he turned it down. I came to rescues her, when alice lost sight of her, I knew where to find her. I found them in his garage, a death trap for someone like Bella. No, I thought, I must try and be civil this time – at least for Bella's sake.

"Hi"

They just stared; Bella begins to stutter my name.

"What are you doing here? You're violating the contract!" The mutt is on his feet now, coming towards me as if to fight.

"No, Jacob I have not come here to cause trouble. I was only concerned for Bella."

_Better now than never. At least if I make a show of effort I might stand a chance of winning Bella over to my cause. _

The dog is shouting again.

"Quiet, I came to say I wish for us to call a truce of such. I will allow Bella to see you whenever she desires, however on your part no more rudeness or speaking down of me, at least not to her face."

Well I thought it was a reasonable offer; Jacob didn't seem to agree. My words seemed to spark more anger out of him. He advanced towards me, his thoughts full of hatred and anger. He was going to attack me, and I wasn't about to just stand by and let it happen. I got into a defensive stance and prepared for his onslaught. But stronger than the murderous thoughts of my attacker there was the memory of what Bella had said.

"Just kiss and make up"

"Just kiss and make up"

"Just kiss"

"Just kiss"

"kiss"

Kiss him!

In an instant everything had changed. I dived at Jacob and grasped him around the middle, driving him towards the ground, with only one intention clear in my mind.

He was still trying to attack me, but his efforts were useless against my grim determination. I would do this for Bella.

Jacob had finally seen the change of intention and had stopped fighting me, and had started trying to escape. About three seconds had passed.

As the dog twisted and squirmed beneath me, I decided it was now or never. And bowed my head – deliberately slowly- down towards him. It took all my strength to release my head from his repelling grip. Now I just had to catch his dancing face.

"WHATS THE BIG IDEA YOU MORONIC-"

His words were caught off in mid sentence as my lips finally met home. He stiffened, and I purposely deepened. I didn't have to worry about biting him, the smell was so unappetizing that I felt I could only hold on for a few more seconds.

After what felt like an eternity I pulled off, spitting to the side, Jacob doing the same."

Somewhere I acknowledged that I should be looking for Bella's always unique reaction.

She was just staring at me wide eyed now. Had I done it wrong? Was it not enough?

"Bella I-"

"wow."

"what?"

"er.. wow?"

I think Jacob had passed out, it was quiet behind me.

"you did this for me didn't you" just nodded grimly in response.

"you said for us to kiss, then you would marry me."

She didn't respond.

"Bells?"

She was shaking now. Oh no! I was at her side in a instant.

"Bella what's wrong?!

She was laughing.

Amidst bursts of giggles she stammered "I didn't m-mean it quite so literally!

Y-you already know my conditions silly"

"oh."

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Thanks for reading guys! hope you enjoyed it

My friend kla and myself thought of this, so we thought we'd share it! Please R&R and let us know what you thought.

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